Wicked Kiss
Chapter 44: Helplessness

The plans for our wedding were going smoothly. I can't even count how many times I sighed. Sooner or later, it is going to be the end of my happy ending.

"Next week will be the biggest event in business industry, Erza. It's our wedding after all. Me, as a tycoon, and You, as Napoleon's daughter." Alstriem said while sipping his glass of wine. I only nodded. I pursed my lips in anticipation. I wanted to run from these. My mood is always ruin from fear and nervousness every time Sir Al reminds me about the coming wedding.

The fuck. I can't even dare to think that it is my decision that made me this way. This is stupid. Very stupid.

Agreeing on Napoleon's threats made me think that I was very weak. But I had no chase, he's a dirty player.

I only nodded to Sir Alstreim and drink wine from my glass as well.

All of the preparations were perfect. Most of the staffs were busy managing it. The wedding is themed in Ancient Greece were the God's and Goddesses in Mount Olympus used to hold their parties and weddings. Alstreim really planned it all. I feel like, when we wanted this wedding, it'll be perfect. I will be the luckiest girl in the whole world.

But, sad to say. That would never happen. I am destined to be dumbfounded. I am destined to be hurt.

And about Astrair? I've heard that he's nearby. I am scared that Astrair will do something stupid, I don't want this to turn out bad. Napoleon held me tightly on the neck, that I almost can't breathe.

"I know you will regret this, Erza. But let me remind you. That this has no effect on me. You will be my wife, and you will be the mother of my children." Sir Al said as if it was that easy.

I looked at him because of what he said. I don't know what's gotten into him that he's too cold all of the sudden. I wasn't even saying anything. But he has a point. Sooner, I will be going to regret this fucking decision. "Sure..." I said and focused my attention somewhere else. I don't want to see how happy he is when he knows that his brother was hurting by now. He knows all about me and Astrair yet, he doesn't care. How heartless. Our conversation didn't last long. It has been our routine since the day they've announce the wedding.

I still have to prepare because an engagement party will be happening soon.

***

I was in the dressing room, watching myself in trio mirror. There is stylist behind me, fixing anything that needs to be fixed.

I sighed in a hundred time.

"Madame! You're gorgeous!" the make-up artist said while putting on my lipstick. It is dark red. Or should I say, bloody Mary in color. The same color of my hair.

"Thank you." I mouthed.

"Why do you look like you're unhappy! You're marrying Lacxous Alstreim Grayfaurd for God's sake!! Hihihihi" the hair stylist said.

I wanted to answer them and tell them the truth. But like who I am in the past. But I chose to stay silent to prevent chaos and questions.

"Some people think that happiness can be found in things that was glowing. Also, some people think that happiness can be found in love. I am happy for what I have. I am contented. But sometimes, we need to sacrifice our own happiness just to make another's happiness come true. That's life." I said and took another deep breath.

"Are you telling us that you're unhappy to marry the man as handsome and wealthy as him?" the make-up artist said this time.

I looked at him on the mirror...

"Alstriem, can be the thing that was glowing. He's loved by everyone who found their happiness in him. But I am one of those persons who only found happiness in Love. I will never find my happiness in things. Never." I spoke. And they didn't ask anything after that.

After five hours of sitting and preparing, I'm done. I was wearing a black backless cocktail dress. It has silver dust all over that made me glow.

I just shrugged. Glowing things huh? It just doesn't empress me.

***

The party started. Sounds of violin and piano can be heard in every corner of the room.

There are lots of people present wearing their beautiful dresses. My mother was beside her new husband while happily talking to the visitors.

Most of the visitors are also tycoons. The security was very tight since most of the important businessmen were here, the Monteveroses, Fuero Vegas and even Kwons and Horbits. Napoleon is already one of the best tycoons, and so was the Grayfaurds.

I am looking on every corner. I almost fell on the stairs when I saw Athrina Grayfaurd together with her mom, Launxi Johan Grayfaurd wearing their emotionless faces.

They are sophisticated. They are Grayfaurd afterall.

I am so nervous. The Grayfaurds were here. It is really possible that Astrair is also here.

Damn! I need more air to breathe.

The emcee started talking. I didn't care with the people after then. Because I'm preoccupied from the idea that Astrair may be here.

I know he'll be mad because I left him that night without proper courtesy. I'm so sorry Astrair, but it's for the own good of our baby.

"I am quite sure, that this couple is the talk of all Asia! Being the daughter of the great owner of NYC and an heiress of the Illuminate Association is already too much, right Gustav?"

"Yes, Aliyah! Plus, the fact that she's one of the models of The Fashionista in France and she's also an architect by profession! She's amazing!"

"How about this man, Gustav? How about this Grayfaurd?"

"This man is every woman's wish. Lacxous Alstriem Grayfaurd is a great FBI agent in United States and he's also a great great great TYCOON. He's the eldest son, and he is soon to overcome and place his father on running half of the branches of GFC that his grandfather owns! Another, GFC was just his grandfather's property, and I'm sure that he will thrive to have a name of his own. There is a reason why people think that they're royalty! 'Coz indeed!"

"Ladies and Gentlemen, you've heard how famous they can be! What a perfect couple. Let us welcome, Alstreim Grayfaurd and Miss Erza Scarlet Asgard!" the emcee announced.

I sighed. When did I ever become an Asgard? That damn Napoleon.

I walked in the middle. I cannot smile. The people were rejoicing, while I can't.

Alstreim grabbed my waist closer to him.

Flashes of camera is all over. And I hate it very much.

"Smile, babe." He whispered that made the hairs of my nape stand.

I smiled. The fakest one.

They are so happy watching us. Including all the Grayfaurds. And I almost forgot how to breath when Astrair's eyes caught mine.

Astrair was clenching his jaws tightly and his deep brown eyes stared at me as if he is punishing me.

His lips are in thin line. As if telling me indirectly that he doesn't like what's happening.

I stopped breathing again when Sir Al kneeled in front of me and showed me the ring.

"Please, marry me." he asked.

The audience were chanting for me to say yes. And I did.

I said Yes.

***

I was almost running to reach the rest room and hid myself on the cubicles. I don't know but my tears were coming out in a hurry. Like they wanted to come out sooner, but they didn't have a chance.

I guess this is my fate. I am fated to be miserable of ever.

I wiped my tears away and fixed myself. Why does everything turn out this way?!

I was about to get out when the door squeaked open and presented Astrair.

He immediately locked the door behind us then slowly walked towards me.

He pulled my wrist and locked me in between his firm biceps.

"Fuck, Erza." he whispered then lean on my left to kiss my ears down on my neck.

I closed my eyes very tight and rested my head on his chest.

My tears were out again. I wish this would stop.

"Damn it." He only whispered while pulling my head up and kissing my jaws.

"I'm sorry, Astrair. I'm sorry. We're not meant for each other. We're not really meant to be." I said and sobbed.

He shook his head.

"But we have a son. Please, Erza. Fight for us this time. Fight for us." He whispered lowly.

My heart is breaking, hearing him like this. I want to tell him that I am weak.

"I wish I can." I said and tried to keep the sobs that wanted to come out of my mouth.

"I love you, Erza. And I will do everything to win you back. I will kill anyone who wants to go through me." he said.

I just closed my eyes and nodded. I know it'll be impossible.

"I know, baby. I know you want me and so do I. But we need to accept the fact that it's over."

***