Spiral (Off the Ice Book 2)
Spiral: Chapter 42

TENSION BUBBLES ON our last day of rehearsals until it reaches a boiling point. Things have been stressful, and I’m sure Elias has noticed how quiet our drives have been lately. Though he never makes me talk. Instead he laces our hands, and we listen to his music the whole way.

While I’m breaking in my pointe shoes, Ashley sits by me without a word. As my alternate, she’s been glued to my side from day one. It’s her job, but her intensity is almost too much. There’s a palpable level of irritation I can feel from her when she sees me performing with Adam. Turns out Jason wasn’t kidding when he said she was livid when I secured the part of the swan queen, because Ashley’s parents have been donating to the theater for years to score her a principal dancer role.

However, Aubrey Zimmerman doesn’t care about that. He doesn’t care for anything other than finding the best dancers. It’s the theater as a whole that pushes the social media front. They seem to think ballet is a dying art that can only be preserved through the new wave of virtual entertainment. They may be right, because as of last week, we’ve sold out of tickets for Swan Lake for the entire month we’re performing in Toronto, and we’re booked solid for the next year in several ballet theaters across the world.

It’s a lot of travel, and the Sage from a few months ago couldn’t be happier. But now when I’ve found my home, it’s bittersweet knowing I’ll be away from it. Away from Elias.

As I run through the choreography in my head, the orchestra begins playing the introduction for act one. I have about thirty minutes to drink something so I don’t pass out onstage. Rehearsal or performance, the adrenaline is just the same.

Our stage manager taps me on the shoulder, talking into her headset as she flashes a smile. I head toward the stage, seeing Adam on the opposite side, waiting to make his entrance. He looks nervous, as in “pale face, just vomited backstage” nervous, but Ashley whispers into his ear and he nods like he’s okay. Still, when he meets my eyes, his harbor a dark cloud.

The White Swan pas de deux echoes through the theater, and when we transition into our positions, Adam’s confidence from earlier doesn’t translate.

“You’re both too stiff. Like fucking planks! Relax,” Zimmerman shouts, his voice growing more frustrated with each move. “Attack it, Sage! Capture the room.”

Taking in his critique, I try to do exactly that. But when Adam lifts me, it feels all wrong. I try to straighten his hold, but his hands wobble, and I feel the drop before I even hit the ground.

Everything happens in slow motion. My dreams practically flicker on a piece of film in front of me when I land on the ground with a thud. There’s a collective gasp of horror from the room. As the scream escapes my throat, a shooting pain sears through my leg and up my spine.

I’m frozen in fear with an uncomfortable pulsating in my ankle. The entire theater hushes when the orchestra comes to a crash ending, enveloping us in an eerie silence.

Adam curses and clutches his wrist.

“Give her space,” Zimmerman shouts, his panicked voice making my anxiety skyrocket. My heart is so loud, I can barely differentiate between the burning in my lungs and leg. “Can you stand on it?”

This can’t be how it ends.

I can’t form any words to answer Zimmerman, but I don’t have to because the company’s first aid attendant rushes to my side. She pokes and prods my ankle to test my reaction. There’s a soreness, but the earlier sting has dampened. I’m looking to her with desperation, when she smiles. With her arms around my torso, she lifts me to stand. I’m terrified to put weight on my ankle, but when I finally do, I almost collapse from relief. Now that I’m on my feet, the pain is only a dull throb that I’ve encountered countless times, and when I rotate my ankle, to feel for pain, it doesn’t come.

I exhale. “I’m okay,” I announce. “It’s not broken.”

There’s an audible sigh of relief from the room. Jason gives me a comforting pat on the back. But all I can focus on is the one frustrated huff, and it belongs to Ashley, who storms out with Adam running after her.

Note to self: Watch your back.